Remember when you met your child for the first time and marveled at the possibilities of who this new person would unfurl to become? You have the same opportunity right now, with yourself.

Divorce is a death, and it is also a birth. The woman who brought you into your marriage has to give way to the woman who will get you out again. You may not recognize this woman you are in divorce. She may look different, sleep differently, behave differently, say things that the married you would never have. She may have different needs, priorities, capacities, even friends and shoes and vocabulary than the person you have come to expect yourself to be.

I invite you to hold that old you lightly and let her know how well she served you. I invite you to let her know she is free to go when she is ready. I invite you to embrace whoever is entering and answering to your name with the same devotion with which you met your child. You matter that much. You are that worthy of being welcomed.